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مشاهدة النسخة كاملة : A flower named Melancholia



Woeful
10-02-2008, 12:19 PM
Under the sparkling rain drops trembling she started writing on wet piece of paper.

Every line she writes soon dies by the lonely drops of mercy. Smiling nervously, she whispers to herself while watching the ink fade away "stop killing my words" even though she realizes that she can't write under the rain, she keeps doing it anyway.

Ancient memories sparked her mind from the dawn of childhood, familiar faces are shown but a single face is somehow unclear.. yet she feels as if she knows who that person is. Looking down on the gray ground, her memories are struck asunder.

As if she has been struck by a head-wrenching headache, she held her head and let a out a cry " No! "

Falling on her knees she started mumbling some words " forgive.. love me, no please" her eyes teared up and her heart raced clinging to whatever warmth is left in her body.

A faint memory of her playing in a colorful field of flowers, and with her was a faceless entity.

"What kind of a flower is that" she says with joy to a boy, "this is called a lilac" he said smiling in a strange way to her.

Running around the field they stumbled upon a rare flower and the girl never wasted any time to ask what kind is that dark-blue flower is. "I don't know", filled with confusion he said it "But lets call her Sarah because it's rare and special just like you"

Blushing she turned away her face, with him smiling in a self-satisfied way.. as if he knew how to manipulate this girl.

the days under the eternal sun passed fast, the girl's family discovered her secret affection towards the gardener's son, she was kept inside the mansion not permitted to go outside without the company of her parents.

Dark circles formed under her eyes from sleepless and tearful nights, she decided one day to send a letter to him. She kept sending her letters with the maid getting her responses back from the gardener's son.

They decided to run away from the enclosed misery they live in. Promises of elopement were made a romantic aroma covered the mansion on the night of the great escape.

Running under the starry sky, through the dreamy field of flowers they both breath the fresh scent of freedom.

Suddenly the boy stopped "Look Sarah, it's the Dark flower" withered away and dying the flower looked so empty. She looked on the flower feeling a strange scent of tension coming from withing, she looked back at him "Why is it dying, why didn't you take care of Sarah!"

He stood silently staring at her coldly "because it reminds me of you" as shocking as the answer was, Sarah felt a tone of resentment and swiftly realized what's going on, even though her heart is in shreds her face didn't show any emotions.

"Do I make you feel small" she said smiling at him, flinching he started breathing quickly with a glare of anger growing inside his eyes.

"Why the silence farmer-boy?"

As if he was possessed by the demons of hell, his eyes inflamed and tried to grab Sarah but feeling she went too far she ran away from him.. but she wasn't fast enough as he jumped her from the back and pushed her aggressively on the flower-covered earth.

The gardener's son slapped Sarah while she was helplessly trying to break away from his anger-driven fists. The boy kept screaming and raving. Hitting Sarah mercilessly without thinking to stop "Who are you now huh? how BIG do you feel now you're on the ground like any useless bug"

"I'm sorry please stop it hurts" she cried

He stopped after breaking her nose, stood up and spat on her.. while rushing to his home.

Sarah went back to the mansion.. feeling humiliated and a certain vindictive desire started to grow on her soul. Stepping inside the halls of the mansions she let out a sharp cry and started weeping calling for her parents, her crying turned the mansion alight and everyone rushed to her.

"What happened" her father demandingly shouted, Sarah then with her face covered in blood continued crying and then saying with a weakened voice while being taken care of by the maids "I can't... say..here" her father asked the maids and only him and her mother stayed, Sarah's mother hugged her daughter and asked her to tell them what happened.

Closing her eyes, Sarah uttered slowly"it's the gardener he attacked me in my room and...

"AND WHAT" her father screamed

"And he forced himself on me".. moments of silence followed Sarah's statement...

her mother collapsed losing her conscious, while her father stormed out of the mansion.



Everyone living near the mansion noticed that night that a certain hut was set to flames, and nobody survived even the latest guest to the gardener's family a three-months old little girl named Sarah after his Master's beautiful daughter's name.

The other Sarah also disappeared engulfed by guilt and shame, and never to be seen again.

Levana
12-02-2008, 02:01 PM
WoOoW


that was amazing
you know what i kinda feel sorry for the gardener's son


;) anyway thanx for this great topic

dream catcher
12-02-2008, 03:10 PM
What The HELL....??

I swear I'd a reply here..!!
absourdely long one too..
(&)

well, guess "montada" is at it again..
.
.
.
anyway, I'll ask again Woeful..did you werote this and the other story you posted
??

the most noticeable thing in this story is the unjustifyable crulety of both the father
and his little daughter..because the whole thing was just "inhuman"...burning that house the way he did..

when its understandable why the father acted that way, I just can't see why
would the girl carry on with her prak when she sees the "Will to Kill" in her fathers eyes
.
.
.
be it as it is...a wonderfuls story
cynical perhaps...
I like the way you handle "the tormented" theme..
talking of this and your previous post..
the main theme is peolpe with a messed up past..

thank you for the great post
would love to see more
and I mean it
(A)

Adios

Foxy.Rabbit
14-02-2008, 12:07 AM
^
I think both are Woeful 's
she said so in the other post


" A flower named Melancholia"
a really interesting opening, enjoyed the
language and the gloomy sense in your story
I didn't quite like the end, felt like it didn't rhyme well
with the whole story


still,.. good job Woeful
:)

Woeful
14-02-2008, 08:27 AM
Hey there, thanks for bearing with the lengthy story. However, I'm sorry to being lazy and not work harder on the ending.. I admit I got tired in the last quarter.

Levana

You're welcome.. he did despise her though, never deserved what happened to him for sure.


Dream Ketchup

I think you deserve to have your nick-name mutated because you imply that I may have stolen what I wrote here. *chuckles* but anyway yes I wrote them, who else would write such gloomy stuff anyway?

In the image I tried to depict is what would appear to be either in a rural area in modern times, or an old tale from an ancient time. So, I think in both cases the father would value his daughter's virtue greatly.. true it is cruel but the father had no choice but to bury the alleged story and its roots.

On the other hand Sarah woke up from her humiliation a bit too late and couldn't handle her reality anymore, leaving everything behind.

It's true everything went down fast.. I wanted to make it look like flashbacks, .
hopefully it wasn't too fast


Thanks for stopping by, I appreciate it


Foxy Rabbit

Hey foxy how's it going?
I can see why you think the ending is rather odd it feels like a castle of sand that was struck by a mini-Tsunami.. I admit being in a lackluster mood while ending it, I'm glad you enjoyed it though.. thanks for coming.. you're always welcome!

dream catcher
14-02-2008, 04:14 PM
Dream Ketchup

I think you deserve to have your nick-name mutated because you imply that I may have stolen what I wrote here. *chuckles*

OMG OMG OMG!!
you're making a joke !!
glad to know you can laugh like the rest of us
!!
I mean no offense, but..,you always seem so serious and grumpy
plus, you write in a very "British" way...which makes look even more serious


about Sara..even if she was "greatly" humiliated, is that an excuse to act the way she did..?
I think not !!
feeling vindictive is part of the human nature, but thats why we got brains for
so we won't get carried away by our emotions, isn't that right..?
if every human being on this planet does what he feels like doing, then there won't be much left for us to live for now, would it?
??
anyway...just wanna know your take on what Sara did
thats all