My dream..

[Rami83]

Hello everyone, How are you all?:) ..

In fact I like to write poems in english and I have some attempts, I would be very grateful if you give me your observation about them.. In this post I'll put my first poem which I wrote it in my first year at college, I hope you like it..





Now I'll leave you with my first attempt..







My dream !!



I see ourselves, walking hand in hand

Leaving our foot prints

In the soft, sunset sand

*** *** ***

I see myself, looking at you

Knowing I love you so

Hoping you love me as much too

*** *** ***

I see you so gentle and fair

The full moon light

Shining of your golden hair

*** *** ***

I see you in the noon,

My beautiful dream girl,

Lighter than the sun and moon

*** *** ***

I see you in the night

As a shining star in a dark sky

Waiting me as your knight

*** *** ***

I see ourselves, sharing our hearts

Knowing we are together

Even though distance keeps us apart

*** *** ***

I see ourselves, living our dreams

Trusting in each other

Feeling what true love means

*** *** ***

I see our worlds becoming one

Feeling amazed and blessed

For what God has provided and done

*** *** ***

Then sadly I awake with the morning light

But know I'll be with you again

When I go to sleep tonight..

*** *** ***

[Another_One]

Rami83

hi brother

:أفكر: i really like ur amazing poem

:08: in fact u have a good imagination and warm feeling

:reporter: i noticed two grammatical mistakes

The first one


I see you in the noon,

it should be
I see you at noon

The second One




I see you in the night

it should be
I see you at night


;) hope u get these notices and do more beautiful one

[Rami83]

Dear brother another one

In fact I can't give you your due in full, I have published this poem in a lot of forums and everyone said, WOW GREAT .. no one tell me about these grammatical mistakes... Thank you dear bro. Thank you for everything very much..



Love

Rami

[樱花乱舞]

ممتاز!

شعرك رائع جداً و يأتي لي بالخيال الجميل

ولكن.... آمل أن يتحقق كلّ الحلم الوردي

I hope all the dreams come true

[Rami83]

Thank you dear Bahia for your kind reply
:)

please accept all my love and regards

[TRY NO RACE]

hi
its amazing ,,i have already read it twice,,truly,,,so wonderful.
you are good

thanX:biggthump:biggthump:biggthump:biggthump:biggthump:biggthump

[樱花乱舞]

Thank you dear Bahia for your kind reply


:)

please accept all my love and regards









ThQ for ur blisses dear Rami

( I'm so surprised....beacause u knew my name..):)

Actually,
I like this peom very much
by two reasons:

The first reason I 've alreay mentioned it in last reply
ur poem brings me infinite & bright imaginations
:)

The second reason
I had thought that the emotions of the people of different countries
and regions was different
but
after reading this poem
I found there r same things
& feelings &
emotions
between the people of diffrent countries..

سبق لي أن ظنّت
أنّ الشعور بين الشعوب
في مختلف الدول و المناطق
مختلفة كثيرة ...
و لكن بعد قرأة شعرك ...
وجدت الشيء النفسي بين شعب الدول المختلفة
و قد وجدت جوابا في قلبي...

At last
I hope a dream isn't merely a dream,
but a motive force to realize happy life ...


Best wishes for u
祝福你

[Rami83]

hi

its amazing ,,i have already read it twice,,truly,,,so wonderful.
you are good

thanX:biggthump:biggthump:biggthump:biggthump:biggthump:biggthump




am so happy that lo liked my poem

Thank you dear TRY NO RACE for your reply

Love

[Rami83]

ThQ for ur blisses dear Rami


( I'm so surprised....beacause u knew my name..):)

Actually,
I like this peom very much
by two reasons:

The first reason I 've alreay mentioned it in last reply
ur poem brings me infinite & bright imaginations
:)

The second reason
I had thought that the emotions of the people of different countries
and regions was different
but
after reading this poem
I found there r same things
& feelings &
emotions
between the people of diffrent countries..

سبق لي أن ظنّت
أنّ الشعور بين الشعوب
في مختلف الدول و المناطق
مختلفة كثيرة ...
و لكن بعد قرأة شعرك ...
وجدت الشيء النفسي بين شعب الدول المختلفة
و قد وجدت جوابا في قلبي...

At last
I hope a dream isn't merely a dream,
but a motive force to realize happy life ...


Best wishes for u
祝福你





Hi Bahia

Thank you again for your another reply which made me really so glad,:) in fact am so happy that you liked my first attempt of poems which I wrote it in 1999 and I wrote a lot after it, but it still take that espacial standing in my soul..

I really wonder :wow: that you had thought that the emotions of the people of different countries and regions was different.. Dear friend, you have to know that human.. any human, Arabic, chinese, European, Muslim, Christian, Buddhist and any one have something called LOVE.. No one in this world have not got love, cause if we can't love, we will not live (this is in my opinion).. So, we all live in a world has a lot of countries and a lot of races and descents, but human still human.. Do you get my idea?:) .. By the way I knew your name from your very fantastic topic about china which you supply us with very important information and funny, beautiful pics. Am really interested of china and its people, and I want to know a lot about it cause I have a lots of friends in several districts in China. So, I'll meet you soon at your topic..;)



Finally, please accept all my love and regards...

[melancholy]

hi rami.1st of all i thank GOD to know a talented one in poetry coz i like poetry soooo much.i really congratulate u for ur great ability of reflecting emotions.i hope to be a friend of urs and hope u read my poem too.am the poet of confidence fight.hope u like it.

[NaughtY AngeL]

Hi Rami, Masha'Allah your poem is nice and refelcts how sensitive and romantic you are, but there is something that I think if you put in mind would make your poem much more beautiful

Instead of repeating the phrase (I see) at the beginning of every line you can put something else. For example you can use I imagine, I visualize, I fantasize, I dream of, or I picture. I think using different phrases will make your poem more amazing and affective.

Good luck
:)