Is love an emotion or a choice? a discussion

[THE Kojima]

I found an advertisment about a debate or a discussion on the topic: " Is love an emotion or a choice?" I really found the topic interesting so I decided to take the oppurtunity of discussing it with the members of our forum and to give a chance to all of us to practice our English. I'll write my opinion later on because I don't want to infulence anybody by reading mine.

[Kubaj]

It's a door whenever you open it' it'll never be closed without a certain price

the choice lies within the act of opening the door

then.. it's all about emotions, dealing with it,.. forgetting about

love when you discover it's unreal

at this point getting rid of it, is painful

[المكاويه]

the choice lies within the act of opening the door




:أفكر: Excuse me
:boggled: but i see no choice within the act of opening this door
believe me,,, its something that happens without giving u the chance to choose
i'v experienced that b4
:08: and im almost doing so nowadays
its really not a choice
u would discover the matter
but after it has become tooooooooo late
so,,, i believe that love is an emotion not a choice at all
:أفكر: Well
as a matter of fact
the choice comes at the end
:( either u choose to end the misery u r living
:p or u choose to go on having such troubles and torments
and i advice that if u know that there would never be a happy end for this love,, i strongly recommened,, that u ;) choose the first choice above
otrherwise u will continue having troubles to the end of ur life
and as they say in Arabic
" ألم ساعة و لا كل ساعة":09:
:أفكر: Wish u all good luck with those whom u love


:o Thank u brother for the sensitive topic
&
:D See later

[Lips Licker]

:boggled: but i see no choice within the act of opening this door
believe me,,, its something that happens without giving u the chance to choose

its really not a choice


so,,, i believe that love is an emotion not a choice at all



I agree with almakawiah that love isn't a choise
unless it will be love for self-interest with selfishness



That's my opinion

:) :) :)

[Kubaj]

Well, it's a discussion after all, no? and I think

it's a matter of choice..

as a wise man once said

Love is like war; begin when you like and leave off when you can

heheh :p

[NaughtY AngeL]

Salaam
It's a very interesting and arguable topic

From my point of view, I think that love starts as an emotion and then becomes a choice
Because you don't suddenly fall in love, you like the person first then you dicover that you love him, and it becomes a choice if you knew, for example, that it's impossible for you two to get married or something for any reason, so you have the choice to step away and forget all about it, or continue and go on risking your love and leaving it for the days

:08: Naughty Angel:08:

[Blueness]

Hmmmmmmm :scratchch they call it FALLING in love ….
Falling is not a rational act…and it’s certainly not a choice …

I believe love is beyond our control …just as gravity…
we get carried away by its force … causing us to fall…

This is the way I see it …

^^Thank you calgary_dude for such a LOVEly topic…

[NaughtY AngeL]

;) I think love is a choice unless you were TOO weak
:06:

[bm007]

Love isnt a choice nor anything else, its a destiny and fate, you can never chose whom you gona fall in love with ,not even guess, it could be the person next door, or may be that person on the otherside of the world.What about if you chose and not being chosen?love and not being loved?Although love knows no barriers,that does not always exist in real life,or at least not any more.Each day passes by, those romantic story we've read about become a history laying on our libraries shelves.My advice, dont you think about love alot, it will come to you evantually when the time is right and you can never miss it, as it sends a very clear signal to you letting you to know that love is knocking your door then its your choice you either accept or reject

Wish you all a lovely life

:)

[konnan87]

...It's a choice

...You chose to get close to that person...You chose to love them

...But once you fall in love with them your emotions take control and to take actions based on a rational choice is very difficult

[THE Kojima]

I'm really sorry everybody for not replying sooner.. Today I'll discuss what everyone wrote about this topic.


It's a door whenever you open it' it'll never be closed without a certain price










I exactly know what you're talking about king_kubaj and i agree with you on this point.The certain prices you're talking about are very high and are usually painful.



So far King_Kubaj, NaughtY AngeL and Konnan87 believe its a choice whereas bm007, Blueleness, lips licker and
believe that its an emotionالمكاوية

[THE Kojima]

love when you discover it's unreal





Why do you assume that It is not real? in sha allah assume the best and wish that it will happen to you.






It's a very interesting and arguable topic



Thanks for the nice compliment ^_^






;) I think love is a choice unless you were TOO weak

:06:



although i respect what you said but I don't agree with you in this point. I'll talk about it later after I get all the opinions






Hmmmmmmm :scratchch they call it FALLING in love ….





exactly;)






Thank you calgary_dude for such a LOVEly topic…



Thank you for your wonderful reply








Love isnt a choice nor anything else, its a destiny and fate, you can never chose whom you gona fall in love with ,not even guess, it could be the person next door, or may be that person on the otherside of the world










That's a wonderful negotiation:biggthump and I support what you said but that doesn't mean that the rest of the opinions are wrong:أفكر: .








...It's a choice



...You chose to get close to that person...You chose to love them



...But once you fall in love with them your emotions take control and to take actions based on a rational choice is very difficult





you believe its a mixture of both...interesting...



I'm sure you all are disappointed or angry at my replies cuz they are so vague and I don't know how to describe them...lol....


As I said earlier I don't want to say anything about my personal opinion now...I'm just waiting for everybody to write their answeres without any influence I may make directly or indirectly....

[**..AhMeD..**]

Hi all
.........


First i would like to thank u Calgary_dude for the topic




Love is not a choice at all

when it comes it comes just like this
..........

u don't notice that u r in love with that one from the first but when u start to feel jelious when u see him walking or even talking to someone

that time the idea comes to ur mind

am i in love..?!!
:bigeyes:

all the peolpe around u will notice that even befor u do ur self..

..>>**<<..

once ago i have been told:

U don't love her cause she is beautiful
She is beautiful cause u love her..

..>>**<<..

i am not tellin' a story here

i am tellin' u guys my experince

what i have said is sthg. i lived it an felt in every breath come in and out of my lungs


..>>**<<..
and the time u get rid of it is painful
..>>**<<..


i just do agree with this point
.................











sorry for talkig all this from ur time

urs all
AhMeD

[NaughtY AngeL]

Hi all, I respect all your point of views, and I'm sure everyone of you looks at it in a certain way for either a reason or an experience.
I do agree that love is an emotion that takes over your heart and controls your feelings for a certain extent, but when I get to think about it, I don't love some one just like that, I love a person for a reason, or many reasons. So why did my heart select him among all the others? there must'v been something that attracted me and made me fall in love! and this is the choice you make when you love someone, even if you'v chosen him but you don't even know that, you choose him because you liked certain things that you found very special! That's why once you get to know this person better and discover things that you don't like about him or shock you with his reactions, and disappoint you in some situations,:( , you can either choose to let go coz you think you deserve better, or continue for the sake of love, and this is where you find yourself too weak!

[樱花乱舞]

Just....

just follow ur feeling....

[The best Tidus]

A debatable topic...

An emotion or a choice?....Well, I believe it's neither one of them.
My question is: Does love (in the way mentioned) exists? If it does who can prove it?
I don't believe it does.... :33:

[Another_One]

salam alikom brothers/sisters

frankly and true frankly

regarding life experience i say it is an emotion

let's think it is a choice .... it become like something u buy ..use it for a while then u throw it

real love .... happens suddenly without any choices

emotion .....emotion

:D thank u brother ..... debate wala araw3

[THE Kojima]

:09:




u don't notice that u r in love with that one from the first but when u start to feel jelious when u see him walking or even talking to someone







Him ahmed???? is it a him u r in love with???????:09: just kidding..don't take it personal brother... I got your point.. and I agree with you.








Hi all, I respect all your point of views, and I'm sure everyone of you looks at it in a certain way for either a reason or an experience





true:biggthump same here guys...its all about the respect and being open minded:biggthump




I do agree that love is an emotion that takes over your heart and controls your feelings for a certain extent, but when I get to think about it, I don't love some one just like that, I love a person for a reason, or many reasons. So why did my heart select him among all the others? there must'v been something that attracted me and made me fall in love! and this is the choice you make when you love someone, even if you'v chosen him but you don't even know that, you choose him because you liked certain things that you found very special! That's why once you get to know this person better and discover things that you don't like about him or shock you with his reactions, and disappoint you in some situations,:( , you can either choose to let go coz you think you deserve better, or continue for the sake of love, and this is where you find yourself too weak





I think I got your point now...yeah you make more sense this time




Just....



just follow ur feeling....



we have a famous saying in arabic: خير الكلام ما قل و دل... it means the best words are the shortest with the biggest meaning...that's what you did right now...thanks for joining us in this subject... and how's the weather in China these days?? I heard from one of my friends who are originally from Hong Kong that its great these days




A debatable topic...



that's why I posted it here;)






An emotion or a choice?....Well, I believe it's neither one of them.

My question is: Does love (in the way mentioned) exists? If it does who can prove it?

I don't believe it does.... :33:



alright:biggthump now that's a totally different opinion.....hmm let me tell you something....weren't Tidus and Yuna lovers??? I think they are the perfect lovers......maybe that won't help cuz their love is nothing but a set of computer langugage commands along with some graphics and sounds....lol....all packed up in a cd....there are lots of true examples in real life..... I admit that at a certain point, I started thinking of it the same way you do now. Before I went through my first experience, I didn't believe in it ( you all know what I'm talking about right? I'm not talking about love from our parents and family..etc.) and after my first experience ended I went through an "EMOTIONAL CRISIS" or even worse that lasted for about.....less than a year... a little bit less than a year. during that year I used to think that all girls are monsters and that love is the biggest love in reality and all that stuff...:09: ...I'm pretty sure you are going through either the first situation which is you never loved before,or the second one, which is you had a bad experience and you're still in the shock..trust me...I guarantee that you will think of it differently in the future.








salam alikom brothers/sisters





wa 3alaykom al salam



I'm talking to you in msn messenger right now..looool...anyways back to our subject.






regarding life experience i say it is an emotion



let's think it is a choice .... it become like something u buy ..use it for a while then u throw it









I can't agree with you more....



I bet you all are wondering how I agree with all of you... lol.. I think that everyone of you has a point... and that point is part of what I believe in....soon in sha Allah you all will know my real opinion about this subject.



Thank you all for participating in this subject... and a big thanks to my lovely **..AhMeD..** and Another_one

[THE Kojima]

by the way..that's not the end of the discussion. if anybody else wants to join us they are more than welcome

[Another_One]

you all will know my real opinion about this subject



:( ????when will u say that

:أفكر: hope u say it soooon

:08: thank u dear brother

[springtime]

Alsalam 3aleekom all...

Thank you so much brother for this topic which is certainly helpful for all of us cuz all contrubutions were really worth reading and thinking..

I liked the subject and I wanted to share my humble opinion with you all....although it's not a matter of opinion as much as a life experience I guess......

I will appreciate any constructive comments on what I will write whether it's related to my opinion or to my English....

Now, I think that love is an emotion as well as a choice.... sure in the very begining of love we found ourselves attracted to the other person for some reason or another, so we feel that we are dominated by this emotion which makes us somehow paralyzed....unable to judge or balance things properly ...yet over time, you get to know the other person more and more...as if the clouds that are covering your eyes tend to disperse and your vision starts to be clearer......at this stage, love become a matter of choice in which you might see that your emotions from the very begining were directed to the right person who you want to share the rest of your life with in all its details

Or, (here is the difficult and painful part) you might wonder if you are making the right choice and whether you are compatible or not!!!! and so many other confusing feelings...though you have to make a move. .. and this move is your choice or decision to continue or walk away

After all, it's not easy to control your emotions...although we think we do.... yet we should keep in mind that there are facts in our life that we can never change no matter how hard we try.....things might go against our desires or emotions

And pay attention all, sometimes we are addicted to be with someone whom we mistakely think we are in
love with..... that is you got used to have a certain person with you most of the time and you no longer can decide whether it's love or something else....


At last, we will be with the one whom Allaha wants us to be with.

Hope that my contribution adds even a little thing to all your valuable thoughts and opinions and worths reading

ALLAH Bless you all

Best Regards

[The best Tidus]

:09:

alright:biggthump now that's a totally different opinion.....hmm let me tell you something....weren't Tidus and Yuna lovers??? I think they are the perfect lovers......maybe that won't help cuz their love is nothing but a set of computer langugage commands along with some graphics and sounds....lol....all packed up in a cd....there are lots of true examples in real life..... I admit that at a certain point, I started thinking of it the same way you do now. Before I went through my first experience, I didn't believe in it ( you all know what I'm talking about right? I'm not talking about love from our parents and family..etc.) and after my first experience ended I went through an "EMOTIONAL CRISIS" or even worse that lasted for about.....less than a year... a little bit less than a year. during that year I used to think that all girls are monsters and that love is the biggest love in reality and all that stuff...:09: ...I'm pretty sure you are going through either the first situation which is you never loved before,or the second one, which is you had a bad experience and you're still in the shock..trust me...I guarantee that you will think of it differently in the future.

[/color][/color][/color]

Well.....I would choose to change my name anyday. + you can't really be sure that they were in L**e (I hate using a word I don't believe in :28: )
As I stated earlier, if you can't prove the existence of something then you can't say it exists.
I believe it is more of a way of thinking, the human mind is a very complicated thing. It tells you to believe something that doesn't exist. Actually, one would WANT to believe in it to escape from reality, and if one can't control his mind then how can he control him/herself?

[المكاويه]

Dear spring time
;) whether u r a sister or a brother
i liked what u wrote
:D i really did
very sensible
very logical
very truthful
...
...
:09: i can say: vet right( though this is a mistake in English



yet over time, you get to know the other person more and more...as if the clouds that are covering your eyes tend to disperse and your vision starts to be clearer

yeah
thats right
u r right
its really the case
we really get to know others by time
and day by day,, we start to know some hidden facts that we'v never thought of
..that we'v never expected
:28: and still, they would lie and say things that r not much into reality
i would really like to thank u for what u'v written
:biggthump and i congratulate u for ur English
u speak excellent English
i appreciate that

[Star_Fire]

Love is an emotion

YOU HAVE TO DEFINE LOVE 1ST
just to know if it is an emotion or a choice
:) i don't like to call it a CHOICE
choices are made by our minds+our
experiences in life
emotion = ur feelings = ur heart

anyways

What is love? When we claim that it's love that we have for someone,are we correct?

Does your heart ache and break when they're sad
Then it's love

Do you cry for their pain, even when they're strong
Then it's love

Do their eyes see your true heart, and touch your soul so deeply it hurts
Then it's love

Do you stay because a blinding, incomprehensible mix of pain and relation pulls you close and holds you there
Then it's love

Do you accept their faults because they're a part of who they are
Then it's love

Are you attracted to others, but stay with them faithfully without regret
Then it's love

Would you give them your heart, your life, your death
Then it's love

Are your palms sweaty, is your heart racing and is your voice caughtwithin your chest?
Then it's love

Are you proud of them
Then it's love
Are you there because it's what everyone wants :33: It's a Choice

Do you stay for their confessions of love, because you don't want to hurt them
It's a Choice

Do you belong to them because their sight makes your heart skip a beat
It's a Choice

Do you pardon their faults because you care about them
It's a Choice
Do you tell them every day they are the only one you think of

It's A Lie :biggrin:

Are you willing to give all of your favourite things for their sake

it's charity:09:

and thanx for the sweet topic http://smilies.sofrayt.com/1/y/hearton.gif

[THE Kojima]

Thank you so much brother for this topic which is certainly helpful for all of us cuz all contrubutions were really worth reading and thinking..











You are more than welcome




Or, (here is the difficult and painful part) you might wonder if you are making the right choice and whether you are compatible or not!!!! and so many other confusing feelings...though you have to make a move. .. and this move is your choice or decision to continue or walk away

compatible?! looool.... nice expression

I think you cleared out your point to everybody and I really like your opinion about it.....








Well.....I would choose to change my name anyday. + you can't really be sure that they were in L**e (I hate using a word I don't believe in :28: )

As I stated earlier, if you can't prove the existence of something then you can't say it exists.

I believe it is more of a way of thinking, the human mind is a very complicated thing. It tells you to believe something that doesn't exist. Actually, one would WANT to believe in it to escape from reality, and if one can't control his mind then how can he control him/herself



I still insist brother...its a matter of time....please send me a private message in sha allah if we are still alive when this time comes...




choices are made by our minds+our

experiences in life

emotion = ur feelings = ur heart









the way you defined emotion and choice is simple, right and is exactly one needs for this topic




Are you willing to give all of your favourite things for their sake



it's charity:09:



loooooool...nope I don't agree with you on this one....its true love when you sacrifice everything for them






Do you tell them every day they are the only one you think of



It's A Lie



Believe me, sometimes that happened to me..I don't think its a lie at all



the way you described the actions and you divided them into emotion(love), choice and other stuff including lie and charity:09: really drew my attention because you are thinking of it a little in a different way than the others or maybe giving more details about how you think of it....you really impressed me...thanks alot for sharing your opinion with us






and thanx for the sweet topic



:08: >>>>oops she's talking about the topic!!!! its nothing:D

[springtime]

:) Thanks alot calgary-dude


Thank you soooo much Makkawea... I truly appreciate what you wrote about my contribution... very encouraging
I really like your contributions as well in this forum, I admire your English
Believe me ... this is not a compliment... it's the truth
Keep up the active presence you 've got:biggthump

Thank you all:)

[THE Kojima]

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

First of all, I would like to thank everybody for participating in this topic ( I hope you all enjoyed it). To conclude the whole topic, I will get some quotes from you guys ( the ones that I'm convinced with) and add some more to them and that will be my opinion about the whole subject:


i don't like to call it a CHOICE
choices are made by our minds+our
experiences in life
emotion = ur feelings = ur heart



sure in the very begining of love we found ourselves attracted to the other person for some reason or another, so we feel that we are dominated by this emotion which makes us somehow paralyzed....unable to judge or balance things properly ...yet over time, you get to know the other person more and more...as if the clouds that are covering your eyes tend to disperse and your vision starts to be clearer......at this stage, love become a matter of choice in which you might see that your emotions from the very begining were directed to the right person who you want to share the rest of your life with in all its details


exactly...it starts off as a feeling and there must be a choice to be taken


I guess that's it....and I really thank everybody for sharing their opinions and especially springtime who described exactly the right thing ( at least to me) and I can tell that he or she is experienced in this subject

و السلام عليكم و رحمة الله و بركاته