Some jokes

[Dark Zero]

Some of my friends told me these jokes, so here they are:

Q : Why are mummies good secret agents?

A: Because they are good at keeping things under wraps!

Q: What is a monster's favorite song?

A: "Ghouls just want to have fun"!

Q: What do sea monsters eat for lunch?

A: Fish and ships!

Q: What monster plays tricks on Halloween?

A: Prank-enstein!

Q: Did you take a bath this morning?

A: No. Is there one missing?

Q: How many feet are in a yard?

A: It depends on how many people are standing in it!!!!

Q: How many months have 28 days?

A: All of them!

Q: How do you start a fire with two sticks?

A: Make sure one of the sticks is a match!

Q: What did one plate say to the other plate?

A: Food's on me tonight!

Q: What is the most dangerous city?

A: Electricity!

Q: What did the chewing gum say to the shoe?

A: I'm stuck on you!

Q: What did the teddy bear say when he was offered dessert?

A: No thanks, I'm stuffed!

Q: When is the moon not hungry?

A: When it is full!

Q: What kind of pie can fly?

A: A magpie! (It is a bird

Q: Why did the donut go to the dentist?

A: To get a chocolate filling!

Q: What do you call a train loaded with bubble gum?

A: A chew chew train!

Q: How do you make gold soup?

A: Add 24 carrots!

Q: What do you need to open a door?

A: A closed door!

Q: What's the problem with twin witches?

A: You can never tell which witch is which!

Q: Why did the witch need a computer?

A: She needed a spell check.

Q: Why do witches fly on brooms?

A: Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy!

Q: How do you make an egg roll?

A: Push it!

Q: What do ants use to smell good?

A: Deodor-ant!

Q: Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

A: He didn't have the guts!

Q: What is a cow's favorite school activity?

A: Moo-sic!

Q: Where do ghosts go to become pilots?

A: Fright-school!

Q: Why did the elephant cross the road?

A: Because the chicken retired!

Courtesy of Kurt Angle of The Magicbox Forums

More soon!

[Dark Zero]

What's better than 7 dead babbies in a tree?
One dead baby in 7 trees!

A doctor was delivering a baby, and right as it pops out, he throws it headfirst into the wall. The woman shrieks "What!? My baby!!" and the doctor replies...

"Cripes lady, have a sense of humor, it was already dead.

Courtesy of the great D. Savior

"Think of words ending in -GRY. Angry and hungry are two of them. There are only three words in the English language. What is the third word? The word is something that everyone uses every day. If you have listened carefully, I have already told you what it is."
Sorry no joke but this one is good

Courtesy of ChaosX721

That's all sadly If I find more I'll post

[yakuza_leader]

hello dear
the jokes are so funny although i did not understand a few of them.
your second part of jokes is so cool. i laughed like a crazy and if i had a gun beside me at that moment i would start shooting people like a crazy :AR15firin:rocketwho thanx alot
im still trying to know what is the third word that ends with GRY,i dont think i can make it ,,beside im so sleepy now may be later i will find out.
thanx for crazy jokes and have a nice day

[Blueness]

^^Hello


Thanks a lot for the funny puns …
I liked ‘em all …I cant even pick a favorite …


And about the riddle …



I came across it before … :

There are only three words in the English language. What is the third word?

" The third word is "language

Thanx D Z ^^

[Another_One]

ha ha ha

Thanks man

[bosson]

Q: How many feet are in a yard?

A: It depends on how many people are standing in it!!!!

thaaanks

its really funny .. but to be honest

i didnt read it all

bosson

[Miss Buffy]

looooool

thanx....

[Unknown]

nice but too

long i did not read all of them

but it is cool

::::

thanks

[Dark Zero]

^^Hello


Thanks a lot for the funny puns …
I liked ‘em all …I cant even pick a favorite …


And about the riddle …



I came across it before … :

" The third word is "language

Thanx D Z ^^

Thanks for the replys.